After 2 months of chaos and worry, I think I finally have a solution to most of my problems. That is to draw more. Simply that. I am still going to move on to the painting program, just going to have to find time and energy to make myself draw a lot more. I can read and think about all the theories on values and tricks and techniques, but I will never make them my skill unless I practice them over and over again. So adding some small projects on the point to observe, focusing on the turning of the form with the shadow line, tonal composition studies from masters. It's going to be tough, but don't have too many excuses nowadays not to do this. Let's get working!